#WorkTripDay 3: When I Got to Wear the Swimsuit of Stupidity

Alternate title: The day I reached 10,000 steps running from Florida wildlife and folklore. In gladiator sandals, because FASHION.

So if you’re following along, I had a bad Day 1 of my work trip. If you’re not following along, click here and here to find out how I started off on not the best foot.

One of the things I did to ensure I’d have a bad trip was I forgot to pack my swimsuit. I am at a resort in Orlando without a car. Nothing is walkable. To even think of walking anywhere is laughable. I knew I’d eventually have to get a swimsuit so I promised myself I could go to the gift shop and not look at the price tag. Ha! I looked. It was obscene, but it’s 90+ degrees so I bought it anyway.

Day 3 I only had sessions scheduled until lunchtime so I finally got to wear the swimsuit of shame! I quickly finished lunch, went to the pool, took a dip and stayed there for about 4 hours reading. It was divine. And then… I got bored.

I had posted on Facebook that the closest grocery store and was 3 miles away and that I was smarter than attempting that walk. And then… I got bored. And I attempted it. For a normal person, it would’ve been a harmless 1 hour walk (one direction). But I’m not normal.

After about a mile, I started to realize we were surrounded by swampland and potentially alligators who would eat me and no one would ever know because not many cars passed by. So I alternated walking in the road and on the grass. In my gladiator sandals. Because of course I didn’t wear proper shoes. Are you kidding me?

At mile 2, I approached a cow pasture, closed off from the road by a piece of thread. The bull in the pasture gave me the stern eye so I crossed over to the other side of the 4-lane highway. I picked up my speed.

At mile 2.5, I’m pretty sure a black bear was walking parallel to me about 100 feet in from the road. Maybe it was a cow. Maybe a horse. It was totally a bear. At this point the hubs sent me a text saying, “keep singing so I know you’re okay,” which is what I say if I have to leave the bathroom while the girls are taking a bath. This scared me.

Finally I made it to the store. I got my snacks and WINE because who could sleep after this nightmare. I called a taxi and went back to the hotel. I had survived another day.

PS Day4 was uneventful other than meeting my squishy cousin, Asher. No post on that though he is a squeelicious little guy.

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